Current location:	The Chick Cave
Current mood:	artistic
Current music:	The Wreckers - Way Back Home
Entry tags:	angst, arthur/merlin, completed, fandom, less than 500 words, merlin, pg, pre-slash

He Knows - PG
Title: He Knows
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst
Warnings: Spoilers for 1.10, pre-slash
Fandom: Merlin
Pairing: Arthur/Merlin
Word Count: 408
Completed: Yes
Notes: Thanks to glistengirli for looking this over even though it's not her fandom.

Every time his father has another sorcerer executed, Arthur dreams it's Merlin's head on the chopping block. He doesn't need to wonder what this means; he knows.

He works it out shortly before Merlin leaves for Ealdor; he almost expects a confession to be among his goodbyes. When it doesn't come, he follows him, not bearing to let it be the last time he'd see the other boy, knowing that Merlin was going to his death.

Once there, he presses--he almost begs--Merlin to tell him the truth--to tell him what he really is...who he really is. He waits through Will's choked-off confession--lies--for Merlin to say something--anything. When he says nothing, Arthur clenches his jaw and leaves them to say their lovers' goodbyes.

He's not blind.

By the funeral, he is livid. When he says, "You know how dangerous magic is," he doesn't mean for Camelot or for himself, but for Merlin. He sees his servant's--his friend's--head on a chopping block in a blinding flash of memory. He says, "You shouldn't have kept this from me, Merlin," and he knows he's not just talking about Will. He fights the urge to add, "You shouldn't continue keeping it from me."

Merlin doesn't speak to him on the way back to Camelot.

Gwen and Morgana see it as grief, but Arthur can see it for what it really is; they don't need to know. They don't need to know that Merlin is blaming himself for Will's death; they don't need to know that Merlin is the one risking his life every second of every day that he remains with Arthur; they don't need to know that Merlin probably wants to have a go at Arthur for a misunderstanding he doesn't even know they're having. Most of all, they don't need to know that he should be returning to Camelot in chains or not at all.

After they return to Camelot, Merlin is a better servant than ever, but he makes for lousy company. Arthur hadn't realized just how dependent he had become on having Merlin as his friend. He did realize just how much this realization scared him.

He thinks about saying something, broaching the subject, but he doesn't. He deals silently with his dreams and maybe his gaze lingers on Merlin for a moment too long after those nights, but afterward, he sleeps well knowing that he would gladly risk his crown for his friend than see another sorcerer dead.